‘You know better for yourself versus for somebody else’ says RGV mom on handling judgement

Local News

EDINBURG, Texas (ValleyCentral) — When people have kids one of the most common things that happen is what an Edinburg mom calls “unsolicited advice” and “judgement from other moms”.

Now she has advice for moms who are going through something similar. 

Loren Dykes, a mother of two children, recalled when she had her first child the comments of how she should parent came rolling in. 

“We chose a little bit more what’s known as a crunchy parenting type way, so I mean I became vegan when I became pregnant with my first. We didn’t do Barbie dolls which was a ginormous chaotic event apparently between the family,” said Dykes. 

Dykes said for those who want to give advice, it’s better to think about what you are going to say. 

“If you have nice, you know advice or something that worked for you, present it in a certain manner that you know is non-judgmental,” said Dykes. 

Before having her first baby, Dykes said she was shy but after she found her voice she spoke up for herself. 

“Having my first, for me, personally it brought out what I think is the woman in me and it brought out strength in me,” said Dykes. 

By the time she had her second child, Dykes said not even comments on social media or in-person from others got under her skin. 

“Just because we have that outlet now, which we didn’t have before, you get to sit there and comment,” she said. 

Looking back Dykes said “mom judgement” is probably a natural thing, but she knows she is the only mother who knows what is best for her children.

“I guess it’s a point of trying to compartmentalize it so that you know better for yourself versus for somebody else,” said Dykes.

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